Sex is a major relationship deal-breaker; not talking about sex or sex-related issues is capable of sinking your relationship to the ocean’s floor. Being with someone who has a lower sex drive or that is not as sexually adventurous as you are can be strenuous. Most of the time when you get the urge to have sex and try to initiate, your partner turns you down—that’s not an easy thing to deal with.
It is not just the physical aspect (feeling unbearably horny with no gratification in sight), not having sex like you want to in your relationship can make you feel undesirable which in turn gradually weakens the connection you feel towards your partner.
Sex drive basically means the urge to satisfy your sexual needs. And just as people have different values, the need for sexual gratification also varies among individuals. It is important that you discuss both the deep and the awkward with your partner before your relationship becomes more serious.
Even if you are not consummating your relationship, still talk about your sexual desires and what you expect from each other in the relationship. What’s more important than having a similar sex drive in a relationship is the willingness to work things out and arrive at a common ground.
Being married to someone who you can’t communicate easily with or who never tries to see things from your perspective is an experience you don’t want to go through. That kind of marriage will be filled with unmet needs and resentment.
While sex is not the only issue that can put a strain on relationships, it is one of the major ones that should be given considerable attention. Like a Lagos-based sex therapist, Aminat Ayeni said, sex is 50% important for thriving relationships and marriages.
There are no two ways about it, you either have to strike a balance with your partner about your sexual desires to enjoy a smooth sailing relationship or keep mute and watch your relationship hit the rocks.