Is there is an easy way to deal with a cheating partner? No, I think not. But there’s always a better way. The moment you discover that your spouse is cheating on you, you are immediately hit with three different emotions: shock, confusion, and anger. It is often nearly impossible to believe that this man or this woman who treats you like you’re the only person in the world has someone else they treat the same way. Different thoughts start to swim in your head and you then begin to wonder if your spouse ever really loved you and what exactly their motive for cheating is.
Then comes the anger: Why would they waste your time pretending to love you when they could have been honest about their feelings. I mean, I know right? I would have preferred to be left alone to be with someone who truly desires me. Confronting your spouse at that moment might not really be the wise thing to do. The following are expert tips on how to handle a cheating spouse:
Acknowledge Your Feelings
Do you want to cry? Go ahead. Want to scream? Get a pillow and get right into it. Or you feel like punching something? The floor is yours. It’s not healthy to keep it all “bottled in”. So go ahead and do whatever it is that will make you feel a little better. Don’t talk to your partner yet, not just yet. Wait till you are more collected and composed. You don’t want to end up crying or saying and doing things you will regret on the long run. Of course, even after you try to fix the issue in your relationship, you will still have moments you feel sad about what happened. Always acknowledge your feelings and try to move on from it.
Avoid The Blame Game
Blaming yourself for not doing enough, being slim enough, beautiful enough or sexually skilled enough won’t do you any good. Rather, you will begin to feel worse all over again. What’s done is done. Blaming yourself, your partner or the side chic/third party will only make you feel bad and helpless.
Assess Your Situation
It is normal to want to know the reason your partner cheated. Listen to their explanations without making any assumptions in order for you to assess the status of your situation. An affair with an old flame is difficult to forgive because you will always wonder if your partner’s heart is still with his/her ex.
If you think you need space and time to work through your feelings, go ahead. Go someplace safe and give yourself some time. Most of the time, getting over your spouse is not a walk in the park.
Don’t Seek Revenge
People often make the mistake of trash-talking or trolling their partner on social media and even going down and naked with someone else when they find out about their spouse’s infidelity. While doing any of that may give you a sense of satisfaction at that moment, healing and really moving on may become difficult as a result because you will be holding on to your anger.
Take Care Of Yourself
This is very important. Go get tested for STDs and other diseases. Try your best to carry on with your daily activities. You may lack appetite or feel like overeating during this period, do neither. Make your health a priority and try to get enough sleep. Lastly, ensure you have some fun.