You see someone, someone you really like, you spend time being friends with them, and then one day, you tell them you love them, but they don’t feel the same. Unrequited love is a different kind of pain.
Unrequited love is a more common thing when you are a teenager: a period when you form your thoughts about yourself, your identity, and about the image of your ideal partner.
Unrequited love can hurt badly, but you can also move on from it. Start by taking a hold of your reactions to avoid making things worse. Then, get space from the person and care for yourself emotionally. Finally, take steps to move forward with your life and consider new romantic options.
Everyone prepares for heartbreak but no one truly prepares for unrequited love. Do not begin to think that there’s something wrong with you. It’s not you. It’s not them. It just wasn’t meant to be.
We’ve highlighted ways you can move on from unrequited love.
Don’t Pretend That You’re Not Hurt. Grieve
Unrequited love is just like any other pain. It hurts. And even though you’ve accepted the circumstances, it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t hurt. Allow yourself to grieve. Allow yourself to feel your emotions, however, they come. Anger, humiliation, sadness—all of these feelings might pop up after dealing with unrequited love.
Do not begin to imagine a life with this person. The more you do this, the more pain you’ll bring to yourself. Do not also think that they will change their mind in the future. Respect their opinion and move on.
The best thing you can do is to accept, wholeheartedly. Do not disturb them.
Acceptance is the first step toward healing. Perhaps, you might end up being really good friends with them. Or perhaps not. That would be your choice to make. But don’t make a choice that would never be.
The Future Isn’t Certain
Maybe the only reason you’ve decided to stay friends with them is that you have a glimmer of hope that things might work out in the future. You’re just setting yourself up for more pain. And might end up resenting them.
You have to keep it in mind that their mind may never change. And you shouldn’t hope that it would.
Find Out Why
It’s easy to just disappear or remove yourself from them once they’ve said no. This might leave you wondering and speculating, rather wrongly, on why they might have rejected you.
Give them a reason to explain themselves. Try to understand why. This will give you a much-needed closure.
Do you long to be in their presence? Do you want to know about their every step? Try to isolate a bit. Do not check their social media pages every second minute. Do not ask your friends to check upon them. If your crush is out of sight, inevitably, they’ll be out of your mind.