Who doesn’t crave love—to love and be loved? To feel the butterflies in your stomach come alive and know that the person responsible for resurrecting them feels the same way too.
When you share the feeling of love with someone, you don’t mind being alone with that person for the rest of your life. The love that person has for you will make him/her care about your happiness, support you, encourage you and share your burdens with you. Love is a wonderful feeling worth having.
So why are some people scared of falling in love? Why is it that some people build a wall around their hearts in an attempt to chase love away? Why do some people call it quits in a ‘no-strings-attached” relationship when they start developing feelings for their partner?
There are a thousand and one reasons for that but here are 5 of the most common reasons why some people are afraid of love:
Love Hurts
If you are scared of love, it’s probably because you’ve witnessed the heartaches that falling in love has caused your loved ones. Or you’ve had your trust broken in the past and are scared of going through that pain of betrayal again.
It is not easy to lose someone you love and being in love can make you start worrying about being abandoned—a feeling you can do without. If this is you, remember that it is not love that hurts, it is people who hurt.
Love Disrupts Your Independent Lifestyle
Some people push love away out of fear that love will complicate their lifestyles and disrupt their plans. You are scared that you will always want to be with the one you love—new love is usually that way. But being with them all the time is actually not healthy. From the very start of the relationship, you can try setting boundaries and arranging your schedule in a way that allows room for love.
You Have Commitment Phobia
It’s not actually love that is scary for many people, it is the prospect of committing. Commitment is a big scary step that many people try their best to avoid. They make up excuses to avoid love even though they do want love. What could be the problem here? Try revisiting your childhood or first relationship and you may find the answer to that.
You Don’t Know How To Give Love
Strange though it may be, there are individuals who have no idea how to love other people. They’ve become used to shutting themselves away from the world and living a hermit kind of life. Problem often stems from a traumatic childhood. Not everyone grew up in a loving, supporting and nurturing environment. The first step to loving someone else for people like this is to learn the art of self-love.
You Fear You Can’t Be Loved
Love can make you feel vulnerable. Every day, your partner has a deeper glimpse into your life and it could be scary for people with low self-esteem. You fear that your partner may not like what they see, so you don’t bother about finding or embracing love. They will leave, you think, once they get to know you better. If this is you, know that you can always control your mind. How you perceive yourself to be is often different from how others see you. Learn to relax and live in the moment.
Love is a feeling that everyone deserves to experience. Hopefully, identifying why you are scared of love will help you fix whatever it is that’s keeping you from loving and being loved.
Do you have other reasons why some people are afraid of love? Share them in the comment section.